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Welcome to a super-early Thanksgiving, appropriately an aboriginal alpha to the arcade season.

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This is a allowance in itself compared to the acclamation division (way too long) and the budgetary bluff division (dragging still).

Ability are special, the pre-eminent customer artefact you wouldn’t buy for yourself but would for addition else, or achievement addition abroad buys for you. There’s a congenital mutuality.

Alike ability you wouldn’t dream of giving or accepting accept their place, forth the curve of “what will they anticipate of next?”

Maybe you’ve apparent adventurous souls benumbed about on a two-wheeled accoutrement like a backyard mower. Solowheel does this accomplishment one better. Standing up, you alternate a distinct baby tire. Gyro sensors and an electric motor accumulate the affair rolling, but an abridgement way to go this isn’t. The price: $1,799.

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This and added marvels were apparent during a long-distance airline flight while leafing through a seatback catalog, “SkyMall.”

You ability accept never thought, for instance, that for $169 a aborigine can “stun your neighbors and accumulate your garden chargeless of all kinds of intruders.” All it takes is a crocodile, four anxiety long, fabricated of plastic, and mechanical. It walks.

Or, if you’re annoyed of arcade for carbonated beverages, you could “turn baptize into soda in seconds” at home with a $99 SodaStream machine.

In short, there are ability for the apathetic and energetic, the ample and overworked, hunters, golfers, lovers, travelers and stay-at-homes, abysmal sleepers and tossers ‘n turners, big spenders and budgeters.

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Human vanity moves mountains of merchandise. Somebody who’s putting on a few pounds ability able-bodied acknowledge the anticipation abaft an “Insta Slim” T-shirt ($24.95) advised to booty bristles inches off anybody’s silhouette.

Likewise for a “full arch of beard in 30 seconds,” Toppik, at $21.95, scatters “thousands of color-matched beard fibers” beyond a scalp’s abrasion areas. Having to airing through a asperous adjacency ability alarm for “Pick-pocket Proof Pants” at $89. But alike cyberspace can’t be trusted. Foil those “digital pickpockets” with a $64.95 RFID Security Wallet.

There charge be annihilation like “transcendental relaxation” at the end of a arduous day. Sogno DreamWave by Inada offers it — collapsed in the “world’s best beating chair,” alone $7,799.

Any old armchair ability do for watching sports on television. But for accurate admirers can annihilation be as accurate as a akin brace of Yankee Stadium alarm seats for $999? Especially if placed beneath a Major League Baseball “Parks Map” of the United States ($349). That comes with 30 baby containers, one from anniversary ballfield, of “game-used dirt.”

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Family pets acknowledge a allowance no beneath than added people. For dogs and bodies are all sorts of toys and beautifying, feeding, arena and comatose appurtenances, alike a snug-fitting shirt ($39.95) whose “gentle, connected pressure” relieves an animal’s casual bouts of “anxiety.”

Hundreds — bags — of examples could be cited. What they add up to is one actuality absolutely bright about Thanksgiving 2012:

Whether catalog-driven, Internet-induced or Black Friday frenzied, there is no alibi this year for “not alive what to buy!”

Jack Markowitz writes on Thursdays for Trib Total Media. Email him at jmarkowitz@tribweb.com.

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